“There is something terrifying about sitting at the back of the class and having somebody ask you questions which you know you will never be able to answer.”
— An adult dyslexic, to British actress Susan Hampshire
The wounds you don’t see
In a world where success hinges on reading, writing, and arithmetic, children who struggle with these skills often carry burdens far heavier than poor grades. Dyslexia and other learning disabilities don’t just affect academic performance — they quietly, but powerfully, shape a child’s self-image, emotional well-being, and future.
School becomes a daily battlefield. Failure is public. Shame is constant. And while the scars may not show on the outside, they run deep.
“I’m stupid”: How struggle becomes identity
Persistent learning failure — no matter how hard a child tries — leads to anguish, anxiety, and often a painful conclusion: “There’s something wrong with me.” Over time, academic difficulties can become a defining aspect of one’s identity.
Nelson Rockefeller, former Vice President of the United States, once reflected:
“I was dyslexic, and I still have a hard time reading today… I remember vividly the pain and mortification I felt as a boy of eight… I know what a dyslexic child goes through — the frustration… the humiliation of being thought not too bright when such is not the case at all.”
Children internalize the looks, the sighs, the red marks, the whispered comparisons. They begin to expect failure — and sometimes even seek to avoid success, fearing they’ll be “exposed” as imposters.
The emotional fallout: Anxiety, shame, and isolation
Children with dyslexia or learning disabilities often live with intense emotional stress. Daily school life may bring:
- Shame from being pulled out for special help
- Fear of being called on to read aloud
- Anxiety before tests or oral questions
- Sadness or even depression as they fall behind peers
- Social withdrawal or bullying due to “looking different” or seeming “slow”
A survey by the University of Macedonia found that students with learning disabilities were up to ten times more likely to be bullied than their peers — a direct result of the visible academic struggles they faced. The emotional cost is high, and it often shows up in unexpected ways: school phobia, headaches, stomach pain, and even vomiting. Interestingly, many of these symptoms vanish on weekends and holidays — a silent clue that school is the trigger.
When pain turns to risk
The emotional scars don’t just hurt — they can become dangerous. A disturbing study in Los Angeles County found that over 50% of suicides among children under 15 had a history of learning disabilities. In Ontario, researchers discovered that 89% of adolescent suicide notes contained spelling and handwriting patterns consistent with learning disorders (McBride & Siegel, 1997).
Another Canadian study from the University of Toronto revealed that women with learning disabilities were five times more likely to attempt suicide than their peers. For men, the risk was more than three times higher (Fuller-Thomson et al., 2018).
These aren’t just statistics. They are quiet cries for help that too often go unheard.
Behavior isn’t always what it seems
When children act out, refuse to go to school, or break the rules, it’s easy to label them as disobedient. But sometimes, those behaviors are camouflage — expressions of despair.
- A tantrum at the door may hide the terror of being embarrassed in front of classmates.
- Truancy may reflect a belief that school is pointless — “I’ll fail anyway.”
- Cheating, stealing, or drug use can stem from chronic feelings of worthlessness or rejection.
Failure becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. The child loses faith not just in school but in themselves.
And for some, the path spirals further. In the U.S., students with learning disabilities are twice as likely to be arrested as their peers. The U.S. Department of Education reports that:
- 60% of prison inmates are illiterate
- 85% of juvenile offenders have reading problems
Healing is possible
The emotional scars of dyslexia and learning disabilities are real — but they are not final. Children can recover their confidence, motivation, and joy.
Above all, children need to know that they are not broken. Not alone. And never beyond help. They need adults who believe in them — and show it every day.
They also need:
- Instruction that addresses the underlying causes, not just surface symptoms
- Opportunities to experience success, one small step at a time
- Time, patience, and a path tailored to how they learn
The human brain is plastic — it can change. When we strengthen the cognitive skills that underlie reading, and combine that with explicit, structured reading instruction, we give struggling learners the tools they have been missing all along.
And when a child finally reads a sentence without stumbling — when they understand it and know they got there through their own effort — the emotional weight begins to lift. Bit by bit, shame is replaced by pride, and fear gives way to confidence.
“You don’t just teach a struggling child to read.
You un-teach fear, shame, and the lie that they can’t.”
— Stanley Armani
Talk to a specialist
If you suspect your child may have dyslexia or another learning disability, don’t wait. The earlier the right help begins, the greater the difference it can make — not just in reading skills but in confidence, motivation, and emotional well-being.
At Edublox, we offer:
- Live online reading instruction tailored to children with dyslexia (including severe cases)
- Cognitive training that strengthens the underlying skills needed for reading and learning
- A caring, research-informed approach that restores hope — one success at a time
We serve families across the United States, Canada, Australia, and beyond.
📞 Book a free consultation
Let’s talk about your child’s unique challenges — and how we can help turn struggle into success.
A final word: Give them the keys
“Literacy gives us the keys to knowledge and wisdom — the keys to the Kingdom. Isn’t it time now for us all to put our heads together, to work together to see to it that those keys are given to every child?”
— Sylvia Richardson
Let’s not leave a single child locked outside the gates of learning — especially when the keys are within our reach.
Bibliography for The Emotional Scars of Dyslexia — and How to Heal Them
- Broder, P. K., Dunivant, N., Smith, E., & Sutton, L. (1981). Further observations on the link between learning disabilities and juvenile delinquency. Journal of Educational Psychology, 73(6), 838–850.
- Bryan, T., Sullivan-Burstein, K., & Mathur, S. (1998). The influence of affect on social information processing. Journal of Learning Disabilities, 31(5), 418–426.
- Fuller-Thomson, E., Carroll, S., & Yang, W. (2018). Suicide attempts among individuals with specific learning disorders: An underrecognized issue. Journal of Learning Disabilities, 51(3), 283-292
- Gresham, F. M., & Reschly, D. J. (1986). Social skill deficits and low peer acceptance of mainstreamed learning disabled children. Learning Disabilities Quarterly, 9(1), 23–32.
- Hampshire, S. (1991). Every letter counts: Winning in life despite dyslexia. London: Corgi Books.
- McBride, A., & Siegel, L. S. (1997). Learning disabilities and adolescent suicide. Journal of Learning Disabilities, 30(6), 650–659.
- Kavale, K. A., & Forness, S. R. (1996). Social skill deficits and learning disabilities: A meta-analysis. Journal of Learning Disabilities, 29(3), 226–237.
- Peck, M. (1985). Crisis intervention treatment with chronically and acutely suicidal adolescents. In M. Peck, N. L. Farberow, & R. Litman (Eds.), Youth suicide (pp. 79–102). New York: Springer.
- Reiff, H. B., & Gerber, P. J. (1992). Adults with learning disabilities. In N. N. Singh & I. L. Beale (Eds.), Learning disabilities: Nature, theory, and treatment (pp. 23–46). New York: Springer-Verlag.
- Richardson, S. (1989). Specific developmental dyslexia: Retrospective and prospective views. Annals of Dyslexia, 39(1), 3–20.
- Rockefeller, N. (1976, October 16). [Interview]. TV Guide, 12–14. Quoted in Lerner, J. (1988). Learning disabilities: Theories, diagnosis, and teaching strategies (4th ed.). Boston: Houghton Mifflin.
- Zigmond, N., & Thornton, H. S. (1988). The future of learning disabilities. In K. A. Kavale (Ed.), Learning disabilities: State of the art and practice (pp. 361–375). Boston: College-Hill Press.
The Emotional Scars of Dyslexia — and How to Heal Them was authored by Sue du Plessis (B.A. Hons Psychology; B.D.), a dyslexia specialist with 30+ years of experience in the learning disabilities field.
Edublox is proud to be a member of the International Dyslexia Association (IDA), a leading organization dedicated to evidence-based research and advocacy in dyslexia and related learning difficulties.
